Beats Me
Dear Frankie,
I have a friend — I fear she may be an ex-friend — who won’t tell me why she dumped me.
Before, my parents spent half the year in Florida and the other half at home; my friend Lynn and I saw one another often. We did fun things like going to fundraisers for shelter dogs, hanging out with dog park friends for trivia night at the local canine pub, and playing with the dogs in foster care who frequented our park.
I saw less of Lynn the first year I returned from Florida because she had made new friends. I was happy for her and certainly didn’t expect her to sit by the window for six months waiting for me to return. This year, I saw even less of her.
When I invited her to get together, she often said she was busy. When I did see her, she was always friendly, chatty, and upbeat. Then she would disappear.
I asked the last time we were together if there was a reason she was distancing herself from me. She said it was a busy time for her, but we should get together soon. I haven’t heard from her since. I’m unsure if I should pursue the issue further or consider it a closed chapter.
Dora
Dear Dora,
It’s tough when a friend avoids you and you try to discuss the matter, and she gives you a vague response, like “It’s been a busy time for me.”
I would make one more attempt. You might begin by telling her that you value the relationship.
Then tell her you would like to know if you did something to upset her and, if so, what it was that you did. Explain that you would apologize if you offended her and would like to get your friendship back on track. If she again says nothing is wrong, she’s just busy.
You might suggest she get in touch when her schedule lightens up. You have done everything possible to restore the relationship. The ball is now in her court.
Best, Frankie
© 2024 Geneva Woodruff
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